Farewell to Elder Wirthlin

A great man, a great leader. I first met Elder Wirthlin and his wife about 15 years ago in beautiful Hawaii. He was gracious and when he came to my in-law's home for dinner, he proclaimed that spaghetti was his favorite meal. I remember his wife as being spunky and sweet.

I will miss his wisdom and his patient advice in his talks around the world.

Serving for Life

Do you feel like you’ve served in your calling forever? Do you say to yourself, “She has a new calling, what about me?” Some callings are more difficult than others. Your challenge might be nursery, my challenge might be teaching the 12-14 year old Sunday School class.

In recent General Conference sessions I’ve noticed an emphasis on “It’s not where you serve, but how you serve.” That’s easy to agree with. But when you’re in the trenches and an expectation isn’t met, someone complains, or you don’t have the response you hoped for after a great deal of time investment . . . you start to forget.

Even Alma wished that he could do something else: “O THAT I were an angel, and could have the wish of mine heart, that I might go forth and speak with the trump of God, with a voice to shake the earth, and cry repentance unto every people! . . . But behold, I am a man, and do sin in my wish; for I ought to be content with the things which the Lord hath allotted unto me” (Alma 29:1-3).

Most of us have to settle for quite ordinary callings on ward levels, reaching perhaps a few dozen people. We aren’t angels (yet) in the sense that we can travel far and wide, speaking with the “trump of God”—so we must be “content with the things which the Lord hath allotted unto [us].”

This past year while serving in the third year of a leadership calling and thinking “Maybe it’s someone else’s turn now,” I realized something. I’m serving for life. Whether it’s Primary, Relief Society, Visiting Teaching, etc . . . I’m a lifer. It doesn’t matter where I serve, just so long as I do. It doesn’t matter how long I serve in a particular calling, just so long as I am serving with my whole heart.

Elder Henry B. Eyring reminds us, “Your call has eternal consequences for others and for you. In the world to come, thousands may call your name blessed, even more than the people you serve here. They will be the ancestors and the descendants of those who chose eternal life because of something you said or did, or even what you were . . . You see, there are no small callings to represent the Lord.” (“Rise to Your Call,” Ensign, Nov 2002)

Anytime I start to feel restless in my calling, I just have to look at the prophet of our church, President Thomas S. Monson. He was called to be an Apostle in 1963 at the age of thirty-six. In February, 2008, he became the President of the Church. He has served in these immensely demanding callings for forty-five years.

Everyone is familiar with Nephi’s words found in 1 Nephi 3:7. “I will go and do the things which the Lord hath commanded, for I know that the Lord giveth no commandments unto the children of men, save he shall prepare a way for them . . .”

You’ve probably discussed this many times in Gospel Doctrine. But let’s look at it in greater context. Lehi has just been commanded by the Lord to return to Jerusalem and retrieve the brass plates from Laban. First of all, Lehi is a wanted man in Jerusalem. He was commanded to take his family and flee for his life. This means that if his sons return to the city, their lives could very well be put in danger too. Second, the family had just traveled about fourteen days to get to their first camp locations. Now the sons of Lehi would have to make a roundtrip journey that would take them the better part of a month—through a hot, windy, uncomfortable climate.

Third, in the ancient Hebrew culture, the men were primarily responsible for hunting. The women did the cooking and set up tents, etc. These brothers would have to fare for themselves for several weeks. Fourth, Laban is not exactly on friendly terms with men of God such as Lehi. Meeting with Laban and making such a request is something that the sons of Lehi don’t relish.

Now when we read Nephi’s response, “I will go and do the things which the Lord hath commanded,” we understand that his willingness to serve encompasses much more than just a willing heart. It includes physical and spiritual hardships, being away from the safe confines of home and family, managing relationships with his brethren, relying on the Lord for his physical well-being, and allowing himself to be guided by the spirit in all things.

Yes, we may feel like we’ve served in our callings forever. But that’s all right—because we are lifers.

New Year’s Resolutions—It’s Never Too Late

January has come and gone, and perhaps your New Year’s Resolutions went out with the dried Christmas Tree. At the beginning of the year, many of us heard the familiar buzz about “New Year’s Resolutions” on the radio, television, or even read about nifty ways to set goals in newspaper articles and magazines.

You might find yourself wondering, like I am, exactly what were your New Year’s Resolutions? They must have been noble at the time, but now that you are in the full swing of work, kids in school, homework, basketball season . . . they are but a distant memory.

And if you’re like me, more often than not, your New Year’s Resolutions fizzled before January even came to an end. So what to do? Is it even possible to set goals after the initial buzz has died down? Perhaps it’s time to look at the type of goals we set over the years.

None of mine have been spectacular, or noticeable to anyone else. Most of them have been quite boring, in fact. For example, I’ve set many goals and achieved them, but they have been the “same” goals, year in and year out. Goals that I set and reset often are daily scripture study or exercising three times a week. I think I’ve been setting these goals for twenty years. Although they are great and important goals, they have become my lifestyle—not really necessary to set goals for them anymore. More recent goals include being more patient with my children; or work-oriented ones like writing 1,000 words a day, finishing a manuscript in a certain time-frame, updating my website . . .

Some failed goals that I set each year include: catching up on those scrapbooks, cooking more than one and two course meals, keeping my office organized, cleaning out the bookcases . . . oh well.

It’s not too late to try something new. And not just because it’s still early in 2008, but because I have been stuck in a rut. I’m not looking for exciting, fast-paced, thrilling achievements. Although I’ll take those, too. It would actually be nice to slow down a little, savor more out of life, and enjoy what is right in front of me. Spiritually, physically, and mentally.

Spiritual:
Instead of reaching upward, I want to reach outward. Instead of reading a chapter of the Book of Mormon a day, I want to study everything I can about the prophet Abinadi. Artists depict the prophet Abinadi as an elderly man preaching to the people of King Noah. But what if he was a young man of thirty, with a wife and small children? What do the scholars say about his life? How would it be to know that you are going to be put to death for preaching the word of God, yet you continue to prophesy anyway—leaving behind all your earthly possessions?

Physical:
Instead of stringent exercising three times a week, I want to take my children on more adventures . . . ones that include a little work and perspiration. Not long ago, I purchased The Utah Mama’s Handbook. It has hundreds of suggestions for fun activities, outings, and vacations with your children throughout the state of Utah. I can’t remember the last time that I woke up, threw all other responsibilities aside, and said, “Children, let’s go have some fun.”

Mental:
In the place of focusing on how I can be more patient as a parent, I want to find more things in common with my children—that we can enjoy doing together. My ten-year-old daughter loves to sew, and so do I. But it’s been a long time since I’ve had time to do any sewing. And my thirteen-year-old son is fascinated with history, as I am. Why not make a list of historical sites and local museums, and then take the odd afternoon to visit them? My seven-year old loves to draw and create, and I, too, have enjoyed that in the past when I’ve had “time.” It’s time to sit down with her and discover what a beautiful world we really live in. Finally, my three-year old is obsessed with horses, though I know little about them. It would be fun to find a place where she can ride them and I might learn something too!

Trying something new might take a little more conscious effort. Reaching outward instead of making lists and compiling stats will definitely be a change. But it will be worth it if my belated New Year’s Resolutions turn from achieving a few goals to creating a lot of great memories. How about it? Are you in?

How the Priesthood Nurtures Women

“The priesthood is the power and authority to represent God.”
—David O. McKay

Although the authority of the priesthood is bestowed only on worthy male members of the Church, the blessings of the priesthood are available to everyone. The priesthood was restored on earth so that "the immortality and eternal life of man" (Moses 1:39) could be brought to Heavenly Father’s children. Priesthood holders serve in their offices to bring salvation to each of us, His children.

Growing up, my father was an exemplary patriarch. I seemed to coast through life with blessings and safe-guards that I didn’t fully appreciate until I was married with my own children. Then life took a fragile turn, and I made the passage from childhood into adulthood.

In 2006, on a cold November day, my son received the Aaronic Priesthood. Although his journey of holding the priesthood has just begun, his life has been touched by the power of the priesthood since before birth. The night before I checked into the hospital, my husband gave me a priesthood blessing. I was petrified, to say the least, to wade through the unknown process of childbirth, something that Elder Holland had referred to as the “valley of death.”

A couple of months later, a circle of men gathered inside a chapel and my son received his second priesthood blessing. Time passed and after a vacation, my ten-month old became violently ill. When I called the doctor’s office, the nurse told me the “bug” was going around and to keep him hydrated. Five days crept by, and my already thin son became completely lethargic. To some, the answer might have been immediate, but for me, it took an act of faith to ask for a priesthood blessing. When my husband administered the blessing to my son, I felt the easing of anxiety. And by the next morning, my son had made great improvement.

But what if we don’t have children or we are single? Or our husbands do not hold the priesthood, or for some reason, they cannot officiate? What blessings are we entitled to through the priesthood? As women, we receive the blessings of the priesthood through many ordinances, including Baptism, the Gift of the Holy Ghost, Patriarchal Blessings, the Setting-Apart for a Calling, Temple Covenants, Blessings of Comfort and Healing, and the Sacrament.

In 1999, while living in California, I checked out the VHS tapes of BYU Women’s Conference from the stake library. I was busy sewing and half-listening to the talks. When Truman G. Madsen spoke on “The Savior, the Sacrament, and Self-Worth,” I paused in my work. The entire talk was excellent, but one statement changed my outlook forever on the administration of the sacrament and the priesthood power behind the weekly ordinance.

Brother Madsen said, “You faithful sisters, married or unmarried, who move daily (and hardly with a break) from the garden plot to the crucial minutia of food labels to the cups and measures of cookery; you, who struggle and preside in the kitchen and keep vigil; you, who reach out to the perennial needs of your family and loved ones; you, who with artistry gather flowers and turn an ordinary table into an altar that summons prayer and thanksgiving; you, who by your very presence, turn eating into a feast—into dining in the name of the Lord, and who, therefore, bring a bountiful measure of grace to your table, lend your faith to boys and sometimes inept men who officiate at the sacrament table. Let the tables turn on your serving. Lend your faith to our trying to act as you do in Christ-like dignity. For this is as close as we may ever come to your divine calling to give and to nurture life itself . . . Come to a foretaste of the marriage supper of the Lamb.”

“Come unto me,” rang through my mind, over and over. As we accept His sacrament, we are accepting His service, His Atonement, and His offering of salvation. In essence, we come unto Christ through the priesthood. The priesthood is an offering for everyone. It serves all mankind—men, women, and children alike. How can women share in the blessings of the priesthood? By accepting the blessings that are right in front of us. By living to be worthy of the priesthood blessings that are so readily ours. By accepting opportunities to serve. By supporting the priesthood in our homes. And by accepting God’s love, His sacrifice, and embracing our own Redemption.

The Passing of a Great Man--A Prophet of the Ages

There have been many tributes to President Gordon B. Hinckley over the past week. He passed away on January 27, 2008. As with any major event in a person's life, I remember where I was and what I was doing when I heard the news. My kids and I like to watch Extreme Makeover on Sunday nights. The news cut into the program and I learned from the newscaster that President Hinckley had passed away about an hour before.

I was surprised, but then again I wasn't surprised. I thought, "He's finally been released from his earthly calling--at the age of 97." He was an amazing man. Tireless. Someone that I can only hope to emulate a glimmer of what he was.

What else can I say that hasn't been said by countless others? I remember re-reading the Book of Mormon one year--although I thought I was on overload for doing it. But I firmly believe that when a prophet issues a challenge, it should be followed.

I met the Hinckleys on numerous occasions--at the Polynesian Cultural Center when I lived in Hawaii with my husband. When my father-in-law (former PCC President) "retired" from his position, we had a dinner in his honor at the Joseph Smith building. I think almost every apostle was there, including President Hinckley. I met him and his wife, shook hands, and we posed for a picture. My grandmother kept that picture on her fridge for many years.

When I wrote Volume Two of my Out of Jerusalem series (A Light in the Wilderness), Marjorie Hinckley had recently passed away. I remembered the raw grief that President Hinckley had shown at her funeral. I wanted to try to identify with Ishmael's wife as she was forced to bury her husband in the middle of the wilderness--and walk away from his grave and leave him in a foreign land. I re-read through President Hinckley's words of utter loss and loneliness, and tried to capture the same devastation for the family of Ishmael.

The advice that President Hinckley has given over the years is truly priceless and close to my heart. Counsel about children, church service, scripture reading, tithing, staying out of debt, marriage . . . have all profoundly affected me. I think the one thing that always stands out in my mind was his counsel to "Do your best."

What more can we do if we are doing our best?

Many times I feel overwhelmed and wish that I had no cares, no worries, more time to relax . . . If I just commit to do my best, it will all work out.

This morning my husband and I went to President Hinckley's funeral. After weeks of snow storms, today dawned bright, cold and clear. The sky was a brilliant blue, the clouds fluffy and white. We sat in the enormous conference center and waited for the funeral to begin. On the big screens we saw the funeral procession heading for the building. Then we watched the families approach the underground door, and gather to watch the casket transported on a moveable platform. The apostles lined up at the entrance into the auditorium and the casket was wheeled past them.

Even with all of this formality and grand setting, I was struck by the simple nature of the proceedings. Here was a quiet, unassuming man who had touched literally millions of lives.

The general authorities took their usual places, except for the seat between President Monson and President Eyring was empty.

The speakers spoke in loving, hushed tones of his legacy of service and love for others. They heralded his sense of humor, his affection for youth, his tireless work. They identified that he, like us, grieved deeply for his wife. But he put on his shoes and went back to work.

A few days ago, I watched the Glen Beck segment in which he pays tribute to President Hinckley. Beck said he passed up on an opportunity to meet President Hinckley and shake his hand for fear of coming across as a "fan." Now he regrets that decision. "I" was able to shake his hand. But whether or not anyone of us have met him in person, his goodness and influence reaches deep into our hearts, wherever we are.

Financial Planning—Mom Style

By Heather Moore

Do you want to have an emergency fund of six months of living expenses, an active retirement fund, college funds for each child, no debt except for mortgage payment, teach your children money management and continue to save money each month? I’ve compiled ten tips that will send you on your way.

1. Set goals. This may seem like an obvious statement. But if you do something as simple as write a few goals on a Post-it note and stick it inside your checkbook, you’ll be surprised at how much the reminder will keep you on track. Ten years ago, I wrote three things on a Post-it. It’s still in my planner: Pay off Debt, Save 15%, Modest Mortgage. In your next family home evening or family council, explain your financial goals to your children and help them set their own. If you pay them allowance or pocket change for good grades, teach them to set aside 10% for tithing, and at least 10-20% for savings.

2. Budget. Let me offer a different spin on this dreaded word. Just take the following step: List all of your fixed monthly expenses, i.e., car payment, tithing, rent, utilities, etc. Then list all of your variable expenses, food, clothing, etc. Be sure to make allowances for expenses that only occur a couple times a year, like school shoes. Total everything up and you’re done. Just knowing the amount of money it takes to run your household will keep you conscious of your spending habits.

3. Large expenses—consult with spouse. It’s imperative to keep open communication with your spouse about what to spend money on. Do the kids need a new bunk bed? Or can you make do with a hand-me-down? When purchasing furniture or decorative items, make sure you aren’t going into debt. If they are going onto a credit card, you should be able to pay that off in full once the bill arrives. Save your true credit needs for things that are unavoidable, like a dishwasher on the fritz.

4. Credit Cards. A catch-22 if you ask me. You can establish good credit by maintaining a credit card and paying the balance in full each month. You can also damage your credit by having too many cards that raise your liability. I’d recommend two credit cards max. One is ideal. There are many programs out there that give you cash back or frequent flyer miles that you can take advantage of. One method I’ve used is to enter credit card charges into my check book. Then when I go to pay off the credit card each month, I’ve already deducted from my ledger and I’m not in for any unpleasant surprises.

5. Out of season shopping. This can save you a lot of money if you are able to plan in advance. I’ve shopped accredited on-line stores for clearance items. Often I can find a pair of pants or a sweater on sale in the Spring, knowing that it will fit my child the following Fall/Winter. Back-to-school shopping can always be a stickler on the budget. Consider shopping in October or later when the sale discounts are deeper. Holiday items going on deep clearance the day following the holiday. It’s a good time to purchase for the next year. If you explain to your children how planning in advance or waiting for sales will save money, pretty soon they’ll be keeping an eagle eye out for discounts.

6. On-line banking. This makes sense if you have high-speed internet access. It’s simple to transfer money, track expenses, and balance your checkbook on a daily basis if desired.

7. Double-checking. I’d recommend comparing your checkbook to your bank statements, then entering your debits and credits into a financial software program (Quicken, etc.). Let the software do the computing for you and your mistakes will be minimal.

8. Become educated on Tax Deductible Expenses. In most states, if your health care costs are 7% or more of your income, they become tax-deductible. Keep track of insurance premiums, medication expenses, and mileage to and from the doctor and pharmacy. Also, keep track of items you donate to goodwill and contributions to charity (tithing, school fund raisers, etc.).

9. Health care bills. Read every health care bill you receive. Don’t pay anything until you call your insurance company and verify that it is indeed what you owe. I once had a $400 bill for an anesthesiologist. I called my insurance and they agreed to cover it in full. A five minute phone call saved me $400.00 that month.

10. Investing. If your employer has a 401k program, try to contribute the maximum amount each year ($15,500 for 2007). This will reduce the amount of taxes that you have to pay. Also become educated on the traditional and Roth IRA funds. If you’re investing for your children, or even yourself, you can purchase no-load mutual funds. There’s no fee to buy these funds and no penalty to withdraw. Typically you’ll have to invest $1,000-5,000 for a minor’s account and then commit to an automatic deposit of $50 or $100 a month. Stay away from trendy funds when you are investing long-term. Check out Morningstar ratings before choosing a no-load fund. Choose funds with a track record of at least five years, and rated at four or five stars. Each year at Christmas time we talk to our children about their college funds. We show how the money has grown over the past year, and how small contributions each month make a big difference over time.

By following these steps and taking good care of your finances, you’ll be on your way to achieving independence and security for your future. Wise investing and saving for the future will become a regular part of your life. You’ll start to think twice about impulsive spending. Over time, your goals will be met and you’ll be free from the stress and worry that comes from living above your means.



Heather Moore is the author of the Out of Jerusalem series and manages an editing company, Precision Editing Group.